Facebook and Social Media Sites…fostering or Hurting Our Relationships?

To be liked or unliked, that is the question.  Please forgive my paraphrasing a line from Shakespeare’s Hamlet as I am refering to choices that exist on Facebook.  There is more attention being given to the possible impact of Facebook and other similar social apps on human relationships.  Facebook has been criticized for seeking “likes” at the expense of anything resembling self-reflection and shared meaningful experiences in relationships.  Also, there is an increasing concern that people relying more on social network responses (I hesitate to call them conversations or open and heartfelt communications) are not experiencing as many actual interactions with other humans. Concern about this has frequently been expressed regarding children and the amount of time they spend on social network sites.  

The American Academy of Child and Addolescent Psychiatry (AACAP) is also concerned and they developed recommendations for parents that is contained in the number 100, “Facts for Families,” entitled: “Children and Social Networking.” This was last updated September, 2011.  AACAP states that more than 60% of 13-17 year olds have at least one profile on a social networking site with many of these adolescents spending more than two hours each day on these sites. They describe the potential benefits for adolescents as keeping in touch with their friends, making new relationships with peers who share similar interests, sharing creative and self-expressive content with others, and gaining confidence expressing what is important to them.  Potential risks include bullying or being bullied (I have blogged about how serious this is with potential deadly outcomes), revealing too much personal information, being vulnerable to predatory adults, sharing photos that are inappropriate, being exposed to a lot of advertising including pornographic sites, risk of identity theft, and taking time away from family, friends and physical activity. The AACAP strongly recommends that parents monitor their children’s social network activities with rules about what can be shared, no bullying, and a time limit per day.  I mention all of this for those of you who are parents and as a guideline for adults as well.  

So, what’s the big deal?  We (humans) are social creatures. A major concern seems to center around the quality of social interactions on the social network sites.  At times it seems that too much personal information is revealed that does not fit the much more superficial type relationships that are the norm on social network sites. At other times it seems that only superficial and/or only positive, idealized information is shared.  If the value of social interactions and relationships centers around fostering increased self-awareness and being encouraged and supported by people who actually know our strengths and weaknesses, then there may be a problem with the quality of relationships that occur on social networking sites.